We've Been Expecting You
by Haha Zombies
Summary: James Sirius Potter finally arrives at Hogwarts, ready for a year filled with dragons, talking portraits, friends, lampshades, a traumatising table incident, Bring-a-Muggle-to-School-Day and much more. But no girls...they're gross!
1. Chapter 1

**We've Been Expecting You**

By: Haha Zombies

Genre: Adventure/Humour/Friendship  
Summary: James Sirius Potter finally arrives at Hogwarts, ready for a year filled with dragons, talking portraits, friends, lampshades, a traumatising table incident, Bring-a-Muggle-to-School-Day and much more. But no girls...they're gross!  
Rating: T – Mild swearing, magical violence  
Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter franchise or anything else you may recognize. The story and extra characters are mine though.

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**Chapter 1: Hey, Merlin**

James Sirius Potter was a happy boy, and nothing could change that fact, not even when his furious teacher screamed at him and his best friend, Matthew McGivney, to go to the principal's office. He and Matt ran out of the classroom clutching their sides, roaring with laughter at Ms. Richmond's newfound beard.

"That – was – priceless!" wheezed Matt as they trotted down the locker filled hallway.

James grinned and ran his hand through his flat black hair, making it messier than necessary. "Yeah, the beard really brought out the green of her eyes!"

"How didja do it?" Matt asked, though he didn't really expect a response. James had been doing tons of weird and crazy things to teachers and students that bothered him. Much like the time Rick Fitch had been bullying him, James and Loreno Stark, a typical bookworm, during lunch, Matt reflected. James had shouted "Attack, minions!" and had somehow, their sandwiches, milk cartons and Thermos had thrown themselves at Fitch and beat him. Or the time where their first grade teacher yelled at James for not washing his hands after an art project. James had glared at the sink and the tap came alive and shot a stream of dirty water at the teacher.

James tapped his chin pensively and stroked an invisible beard. "I'm Merlin," he said in a deep voice and widened his eyes, in an attempt to seem powerful. Matt laughed and punched James' shoulder. "You wish!"

They stopped in front of the glass doors that lead to the school's main office. Next to the doors was a plaque that read "Godric's Hollow Primary School – founded in 1950" Underneath was the school's motto "Expect to be respected".

The secretary, Mrs. Hooverfield, was a fish-eyed middle-aged lady with brown hair in a ponytail. She raised her head from the computer and laughed as James and Matt entered.

"Back again, Mr. Potter and Mr. McGivney? Fourth time this month, really, you guys have to control yourselves."

Matt flashed a brilliant smile. "We still have next year to cause more trouble, it'll be our last year here too!"

James smiled too and they entered another set of doors that led to the principal's office. Mrs. Hooverfield couldn't help but notice that James' smile was a bit forced. Maybe James was moving? She certainly hoped not, him and Matt were quite the pair, she mused as she continued entering data of next years kindergarteners.

xxxxxx

James sighed as he walked home with his little brother and sister, Albus and Lily. They were chatting with their muggle friends that lived nearby while he lagged behind them. Matt took the bus home with Rick Fitch and a load of other students. Still, James' mind wandered back to Matt's comment in the school office. _We still have next year to cause more trouble_…but that wasn't true at all, James thought sadly. He was going to go to Hogwarts, the same school his parents, Harry and Ginny Potter went to because, he really was a wizard. Matt did not know that, and James was sure he was not a muggle-born wizard, because throughout their years together, Matt had never shown any sign of magic.

Harry had insisted that the children attend muggle schools to learn math, English, science and such. It was always risky to send magical children to muggle school since they can not control their magic. James, on the other hand, had soem mild control over his accidental magic, so he constantly used it to stop people from bullying him and to prank unsuspecting teachers. Harry had given up on reprimanding his son on the consequences of showing muggles magic, after all, James never listened. He loved having power over some of the eighth graders in the school and wasn't about to stop using magic just to please his parents. In consequence of going to a muggle school, James ended up being best mates with a muggle, who he'd rarely see after grade five. Truth was, he was very excited about going to Hogwarts, and he barely gave Matt a second thought, until he realized that Matt wouldn't be with him any longer. He had put off telling Matt that he'll be gone next year since he was afraid that Matt will take it badly and get angry. It was nearly the end of the school year, and he can't keep on pretending that he'll be there next year. I'll tell him tomorrow, he decided firmly as he followed Lily and Albus into their home in Godric's Hollow.

xxxxxxx

It was a sweltering hot June, and the spirits were high. School was nearly over, or more precisely, it was the last week of school. The teacher's were either excited or sad about not seeing the students for a couple months, but most of all, the fifth grade teachers were confused at the sudden end of friendship between James and Matt. Something had happened during May that somehow managed to destroy their bond. Most teachers were both sad and relieved, seeing as now there were fewer pranks played on them, but it hurt them to see two good friends glare at each other all day.

"Hey," Loreno Stark smiled shyly at James. He cleared his throat, and then continued. "Er…it's my birthday on the last day of school, and I'm having a party. Here's the invitation." After handing James a folded piece of paper, he ran off to find some other people. James glanced down at the invitation, and then looked around to class, trying to see who else got invited. In fact, he was really confused at why Loreno even invited him. Perhaps it was the time in grade four with the sandwich incident that Loreno decided to be his friend, but they never really talked or hung out together. He narrowed his eyes when he saw Matt chatting with Loreno holding a similar piece of paper. I am not going let Matt stop me from going to this party, James repeated to himself as he tucked the invitation safely in his homework folder.

Matt had spent the past month cold shouldering James ever since he told him that he was leaving to go to a boarding school somewhere in Scotland. "It's a family tradition; I never said I wanted to go!" James had pleaded to him. "Look, I'm sorry mate, but I can't change it! My parents already registered and all that!" Matt had been furious. If James had been a good friend, he would've tried harder to not go to this stupid boarding school, but obviously, James preferred school over his best mate, Matt reasoned. He knew this was not true, but being angry was better then being hurt, and he was hurt.

xxxxxxx

"Brilliant match, Loreno!"

"Yeah, great game!"

"Did you see me? Third place, not bad, eh?"

"Can it, James!"

A group of fifth grade boys chattered non-stop on their way to Loreno's house after an intense game of laser tag. It was a Friday, which happened to be the last day of school, which also happened to be a certain boy's birthday. The talk of the laser tag game continued all the way through dinner until the time came to unwrap the presents.

Loreno grinned and looked at everyone from his spot on the couch, happy to be in the centre of attention. He was usually a quiet boy at school, very studious, but for some reason that no one could explain, he was good at sports. He looked like a pushover and was very small, but somehow managed to be really good at basketball and volleyball. One by one, he unwrapped his presents to the applause of his friends. There were books, toys, clothing, and for some reason, a Barbie doll, which was sent by James along with a real present, for laughs. Then, Loreno's mother came into the room with a smile on her face. She was a tall and imposing figure, wearing a business suit. She had just come home from work.

"Loreno, you got another present! I found this in the mailbox, look!" Curious, Loreno took the letter from his mother as the group of boys crowded around him for a better look. James took one look at the letter and gasped. Matt raised his eyebrows then looked away. On the letter, in green ink that most definitely did not come from a normal ballpoint pen, was the words

_Loreno Stark_

_Black leather couch_

_32 Stanley Lane_

_Godric's Hollow_

The boys burst out laughing. "How did you know where I was sitting?" Loreno asked the group at large, not sure who sent the letter. James twitched, but kept his mouth shut, unsure if he should talk or now. Matt continued staring at him suspiciously. No one else noticed, but they all insisted that they didn't send the letter. Shrugging, Loreno ripped open the letter and took out one of the pieces of paper in it, his eyes widening after each line until finally, he burst out laughing. His mother was standing behind him, and snatched the letter out of his hands, trembling. "Hey!" Loreno protested as he wheeled around to face his mum. But before he could do anything, the door bell rang. His mother strode out of the room and opened the door. There were a couple of parents there, ready to pick up their child.

"What's on the letter?" they asked as they were getting ready to leave. Loreno grinned and opened his mouth, ready to tell the story, but his mother cut in.

"It was a letter from his aunt." She said crisply and glared at Loreno. "She's was telling a joke, that's why it was funny."

Soon enough, when only James and Matt were left, Harry came to pick up his son. The resemblance between father and son was astounding, except for James' hazel eyes and flatter hair. James rushed over to his dad and tugged on his fathers coat insistently.

"He got the letter," James whispered. Harry blinked for a moment then nodded sombrely. He cleared his throat and looked at Mrs. Stark, Loreno's mom.

"I need to talk to you for a moment," he said seriously. Mrs. Stark was taken aback.

"Has my son done anything?" she blinked, confused.

"It's about the letter."

"Wait," Loreno interrupted, "James, you sent it?" James shook his head vigorously. Loreno was about to talk when his mother butt in again.

"What about the letter?" she said in a sharp tone. Harry gave a small smile. "It's real."

"No it isn't! It can't be! The letter said that I was going to Hogwarts! It said that it's a school for magic! For wizards! Like Merlin and stuff! That's impossible!" Loreno blurted out, happy to finally get rid of all the information from his system. Matt laughed and nodded and looked expectantly at James, knowing that he would make some comment about the ridiculousness of this event. But James continued to look serious.

"It's real…that's where I'm going next year," James muttered.

Matt stared at him for a moment then narrowed his eyes. Was this some elaborate prank? Was magic really the answer to everything that James did? It seemed impossible and way too far-fetched, but Matt couldn't suppress the mounting jealousy somewhere around his navel. Why was his best friend allowed to do magic? Why was some book nerd also allowed to do magic? Why not him? Wouldn't hanging around with a wizard for nearly six years rub off on him and make him magical too? WHY? Matt shook with anger at the whole unfairness of the situation.

Loreno, on the other hand, was delightful and confused. He wanted to believe it was real, but leave to James to concoct something like this. All the fantasy books he read flooded into his head. Would they be using wands? Or just snapping their fingers and stuff would appear? Do the incantations rhyme or not? He wasn't that good at poetry, so he hoped not. Does this mean that dragons and elves are real too? Will they be transported into another realm through a portal or something? Do they have Dragon Riders? It would be awesome if he could have a pet dragon, and they could talk and fight evil together.

Meanwhile...

Mrs. Stark stared stonily at Harry. "Mr. Potter," she began stiffly. "I already know about his…magic school, if you could call it. My…brother was a wizard too. Jimmy Peakes. And frankly, I think it's dangerous. He says that he sprouted leeks out of his ears once. Are you saying my son is one of …them?" Harry suddenly grinned.

"Jimmy? He was on my Quidditch team! Good beater, he was. But yes," he continued hastily. "You son is a wizard, and I'm sure he'll become a great one too." Mrs. Stark didn't even want to ask what Quidditch was. She was actually quite jealous of her brother, and now she was jealous of her son. She wanted to do magic, to be involved in magic, to live with magic, but that wasn't possible. As her brother had kindly put it, "You're just a muggle, bet you can't turn tables into pigs, eh?" She frowned at the memory.

"Oh, it's not that dangerous, I assure you," Harry said reassuringly. "The school will teach you how to defend yourself against these things, Mrs. Stark." She nodded mechanically, her mind still wandering on her brother. Perhaps it was time she gave him a call.

"Please, call me Samantha," she said. "You needn't bother explaining everything to me; I will get my brother to do that." Harry stifled a sigh of relief. He really didn't want to deal with someone Petunia; he had enough of her for a lifetime.

"Great, I should be taking my son home with me. Maybe we'll see each other at Diagon Alley?" Harry smiled politely. Samantha nodded and looked at her own son. He had a dreamy, ecstatic expression on his face, and she really didn't want to spoil this by being a jealous old lady.

Meanwhile...

James was conversing in a low voice with Matt. "Look, I'll buy you lots of cool magic stuff, okay? It'll be great for pranking. My uncle owns a joke shop and they sell these brilliant Skiving Snackboxes that get you out of class. You eat one end, and you vomit, then you eat the other, and you're fine. Great, isn't it?" Matt nodded with the smallest of smiles.

"I only wish I could come with you!" he blurted out. James nodded solemnly.

"Same here, mate, but no can do. We'll still see each other over winter break and the summer, right? Still friends?" he asked, adding the last part uncertainly.

"Yeah, I guess, but it'll be weird knowing that you could turn me into a rat with a wave of your wand or something," Matt muttered. James sighed and ran his fingers through his hair again.

"Really, there's so much I have to explain to you. I can't do human transfiguration until sixth year, it's really complicated. It's more than just wand waving. I can't wait to bring you round to my place. Now that you know about magic, you're allowed in my house."

Matt raised his eyebrows questioningly. James laughed at his confusion. "We've got moving pictures, self-washing pots, a house elf and a mirror that talks to you. Obviously we can't let muggles into our house!" Loreno snapped out of his daydream.

"You mean like Snow White?" he said eagerly. James scoffed. "Snow White was a fool. You never insult a witch and get away with it." Matt and Loreno blanched.

"She was real?" they yelled in unison. James rolled his eyes. "Yeah, the witch used a Polyjuice Potion to turn herself into someone else. And it's quite easy to poison an apple. But not all witches are evil," he added, looking at the horrified faces of his friends. "That's just a common prejudice. And witches don't have green faces and warts."

Harry coughed and clapped his hand on his son's shoulder. "Where did you learn about Polyjuice Potion?" he asked suspiciously, not ever recalling telling his son about his second year. James turned around and grinned.

"Uncle Ron told me. He tells me everything; I think he really enjoys boasting about all the things you guys did when you were young." Harry shrugged.

"Right, well, we have to go now. See you at Diagon Alley, Loreno. And Matt," Harry paused, unsure what to say to him, after all, he was only a muggle and couldn't join them at Diagon Alley. James finished Harry's sentence for him.

"We'll buy out Diagon Alley for you," James promised, then adding with a solemn face, "Use the pranks well. Be sure to get Ms. Richmond, that old hag." Matt grinned in spite of himself and swept into a mock bow.

"Yes, Merlin."

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**A/N: **Err, was it okay? I like harsh and nice reviews :D


	2. Chapter 2

**We've Been Expecting You  
**By: Haha Zombies

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter franchise or anything else you may recognize. The story and extra characters are mine though.

**Chapter 2:**** The Marauder's Map**

"WHAT?" screamed an outraged Samantha Stark. Her blond hair seemed to quiver with static even if it was in tight curls. Passer-bys glanced curiously towards their direction, and some even stared rudely at them, interested in a nice fight. Her son fidgeted with a piece of paper in his hand nervously.

"I have to run through the brick wall," he muttered, lowering his gaze. He brushed his bangs away form his eyes and bit his lip. God knows what's wrong with those wizards, forcing children to walk straight at a brick wall to get onto the platform. His mother found it all extremely irresponsible and deemed wizards all to be completely insane. Fuming and a bit embarrassed at the staring bystanders, Samantha rounded onto her brother, who happened to be a wizard, unlike her, who was accompanying them to Platform 9 and ¾.

"Why didn't you tell me this?" she questioned him furiously. Jimmy Peakes chuckled.

"Well, seeing as you refused to come with mum and dad to see me off, I think you deserve a nice scare. Oh go on, Loreno, it's not going to hurt you," Jimmy said. He patted his nephew encouragingly and nudged him closed to the brick wall dividing Platforms Nine and Ten.

Mr. Stark, Samantha's husband, was observing all this with a maniacal glint in his eyes. He was actually pleasantly surprised after finding out about magic and became quite obsessed with it. Last month, when the family had gone to Diagon Alley with Jimmy Peakes, Mr. Stark nearly lost it when he saw the pictures move, the goblins at the bank, and tasted Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. He spent his free time jotting down all the flavours he had tasted, his favourites including sugar, grass, fried fish, and Chinese noodles. He had spent his son's college fund (not that Loreno needed that anymore) on loads of meaningless things in Polish's Wizarding Furnishings. Now, the Stark family had couches that coughed out dust every day at one in the morning, pots that cleaned themselves, and coat racks that bowed and took jackets.

"C'mon then, son," Mr. Stark enthused. "Listen to your uncle! This ought to be interesting."

Loreno looked at the wall hesitantly and drummed his fingers on the bar of his trolley. His new barn owl, Homer, hooted in his cage. Mr. Stark and Jimmy sighed at the same time and both lunged at Loreno, grabbing him and his trolley, forcing him through the brick wall. Loreno closed his eyes and winced, waiting for the impact that never came.

"Well, I never!" muttered Samantha indignantly, stumbling through the brick wall moments later, with the help of Jimmy. Loreno opened his eyes cautiously and gasped. A huge red train bearing the words "Hogwarts Express" was stationed at the platform. A couple wary parents and students were milling around and checking the clock constantly. It was only 10AM, still one hour until the train arrived. They were unnecessarily early; the train wasn't even emitting smoke yet. Loreno had to admit, he expected to be teleported to Hogwarts or taken something much more magical then a mere train. Although, after reading _Hogwarts: A Revised and more Accurate History, including Everything the Previous Edition had Failed to Mention_ by Hermione Granger at least 20 times, he knew that he shouldn't be fooled by the simple train. Apparently, there were 142 staircases and tons of secret passageways like a real castle should have.

"Should be exciting, eh?" Jimmy smiled, startling Loreno out of his mental rereading of his magical textbooks. "I remember when I was your age, just finding out all those things I did was actually magic…and I heard the jinx of the Defence job was lifted after Voldemort died. I played beater on the Gryffindor team, mind you. Coached by the famous Harry Potter, of course. Quidditch is a great sport, just wait till the first match. I heard that Ravenclaw whipped up a great team and won the cup five years in a row recently."

As he spoke, he grabbed Loreno's trunk and heaved it onto the train. Loreno nodded as they walked along the aisle to find a compartment. Just as Jimmy levitated Loreno's trunk onto the racks above an empty compartment, Loreno blurted out something that had been troubling him for the past few days.

"What if I don't get into Gryffindor?" After all he heard, that was the only house that he wanted to be in, and it bugged him to think that he wasn't brave enough. What if he wasn't anything, and had to be sent back home? Jimmy smiled knowingly.

"Ah, it doesn't really matter what house you get in. I think Slytherin has gotten a lot better, although I doubt you'll be one, you're a Muggle-Born, see? Not that it's bad, of course," he added hastily. Loreno sighed inwardly, glad he couldn't be a Slytherin; it was the evil house. Jimmy patted Loreno's head before continuing.

"Now, a fair bit of advice. Do not cross Professor McGonagall. Strictest teacher in the world and doesn't mind taking points from her own house. Beware of Peeves, he's an evil git and loves picking on first years, so don't give him a reason to bother you. The Bloody Baron is the only ghost that can control him. Do not pick fights with anyone until you learned a Stunning Spell or something equally harmful, not that I'm encouraging you to duel. Make note of every single secret passageway, you won't believe how helpful it is when you're trying to run away from Filch...or whoever the caretaker is now. Ask the paintings on the walls for directions, but not that crazy knight. He's mental and you should avoid him," Jimmy lectured. Then, seeing the horrified expression on Loreno's face, he stopped rambling. "It's quite alright, I didn't have anyone to tell me all this before I left and had to figure it all out myself. Hogwarts holds some of my best memories."

After extracting _Standard Book of Spells Grade One_ by Miranda Goshawk from Loreno's trunk, then stowing the trunk safely back on the rack above his compartment, Loreno bid his parents and uncle good-bye. The clock read 10:17 as Loreno ducked back into his lonely compartment and read his textbook to pass time and hopefully learn some spells.

The window of his compartment was open, so that he could hear snatches of conversations that floated in. His ear was always on the lookout for any sign of James Potter; the one person he actually knew, albeit not that well. Soon, the platform become more and more crowded as parents and children alike arrived.

The voices outside the train distracted him from his reading. He could see a small Asian girl crying and refusing to let go of her mother. The mother reprimanded her daughter in a foreign language and pried her away. Another family with a boy with spiky 72% cocoa dark chocolate hair was arguing with his parents. Further along, two witches were gossiping happily together.

"Did you hear about the M.U.D.B.L.O.O.D.S.? It was all over the Prophet. They're kind of insane," one of them giggled. The brunette nodded.

"I can't believe they actually used that word as their name!" she said. "Though I guess it kind of neutralizes the intention behind the word."

Close to Loreno's window, a cluster of orange haired men were talking loudly. Suddenly, in a burst of feathers, one of them turned into a bright yellow canary, causing the people on the platform to burst into laughter. As the man turned back to normal, he glared and polished his glasses.

"Oh Percy, after growing up with George for half your life, you think you'd stop taking anything he offered you!" chortled a long-haired and badly scarred guy.

"Well, I was thought he would have matured over the years," the man with the glasses, Percy, sniffed. "Clearly I thought wrong."

"We – I am always looking for new testers for our – my products," a freckly and stocky man said, his smile faltering as if remembering a bad dream.

"I am your brother!" Percy said indignantly.

"All the more reason!" retorted the stocky man. The scarred man cut in hastily.

"Where are Fred, Lucy and Louis? They're both starting this year with James," he asked. The stocky man shrugged carelessly while Percy craned his neck around trying to look for the kids.

"Probably with Angelina or something. Now that you mention James, I can't seem to see Harry's family. Late probably," commented the stocky man.

Loreno's eyes drifted away from the quarrelling redheads to look for James. They were probably family, Loreno thought, remembering James' little sister's bright red hair. He checked his watch. 10:45AM. The platform was slowly becoming more misty due to the smoke coming from the engine. He looked around his empty compartment, hoping that someone would burst in and sit with him. Through the glass doors, he saw the previously crying Asian girl with another girl with long black hair, chatting about algebra.

"My mum makes me do work out of this Chinese math book every night!" she moaned. "And I had to bring it with me and do a chapter every night! I don't like finding area and stuff." The long hair girl grinned.

"Not as bad as me, I'm already on two variable algebra, and I just barely understand it!" she countered. The other girl laughed.

"I didn't see any English or maths textbooks in my book list, do they even teach it there?" she asked. The long haired one shook her head.

"Nah, there's a reason why pure-blood supremacists in Britain are all stupid. They never learn proper maths because they hate the Muggle subjects. My parents went to Qing Xing Mo Fa Xue Xiao in China; they taught maths there along with magical subjects," she said sagely. "They were pure-bloods and moved here when I was four."

Loreno didn't hear anything else as the girls hurried into the compartment next to him. He frowned at the girl's comment about stupid wizards. James went to a Muggle school with him, which just goes to show how little those girls knew.

Then, his compartment door flew open. James strutted in and sat down across form Loreno then shook his flat hair to make it messy. "I saw you through the window and came here. We were nearly late. It was Al's fault; he fed the cat some of my Ton-Tongue Toffee. Mum blamed it on me for some reason." Loreno smiled happily; glad to have some company, even though he had no idea what to say to James.

"Oh, that's where's you've gotten to," said a mellow voice as a strawberry blond boy drifted into the compartment. He was strangely pretty and fragile with pale skin and light eyes. He stared at Loreno for a moment, which became uncomfortable for the latter and he buried himself in his book. James snorted as Louis sat down next to Loreno.

"Hey Louis, hopefully you got Lucy off our backs. Reckon she'll leave after I give her some Creature Confection?"

Loreno was mildly interested. "And what does that do?"

James grinned. "You go around sounding like an animal for an hour when you eat it. Last time, I tried it on dad and he kept on squealing like a pig every time he opened his mouth. He had an Auror meeting that morning too! Every Confection is a different animal, you see."

Louis shrugged and stared out the compartment, as if expecting someone to come. Moments later, an orange haired and freckly boy ran into the compartment and slammed the door shut, panting. "Ditched…Lucy…finally." He flopped down next to James dramatically. "She was ranting about changing into our Hogwarts uniforms and trying to warn me to not do anything stupid before we even get Sorted. I don't even understand how she could be Molly's sister," he complained. James nodded enthusiastically.

"Yeah, remember when Molly came home with her hair dyed black and three nose rings? It took Aunt Audrey all her power to stop Uncle Percy from kicking her out of their house," he said happily. "Although, now I'm not really surprised at how she managed to get into the snake pit. Imagine what our parents would do if we got into Slytherin." He added in a disgusted tone.

"My uncle says the Slytherins aren't that bad," Loreno said quietly. The orange haired boy and James looked at him in surprise.

"You shouldn't say that, you're a Muggle-Born!" James scoffed. "You're first in line to be picked on and hexed." Loreno looked shocked and hurt. Not wanting to say anything else, he ducked his head behind his book again, trying to learn the hovering charm. Nobody in the compartment spoke for a few minutes.

"Oh…" Louis remarked, breaking the awkward tension. "The train's moving." The boys clambered over to the window and waved madly at their parents as the train slowly left the station. Loreno didn't bother, seeing as they had left a while ago. Inside, his heart leapt with excitement at the prospect of actually leaving his parents and learning magic.

"So, I'm Fred," the orange haired boy said after settling down in their compartment and stared at Loreno pointedly. "Fred Weasley, son of the owner of Weasley Wizard Wheezes." Loreno's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"That flashy shop in Diagon Alley? I've always wanted to go in, but my parents won't let me," he said. James rolled his eyes.

"Oh yeah? I'm Harry Potter son. The famous Potter who saved the world from Voldemort. Of course, all of you knew this already." He looked around the compartment impressively, as if daring them to tell him that their father was better.

"I'm Louis Weasley," Louis said in an offhand voice. "My parents were normal people." Loreno laughed quietly and put down his book.

"I'm Loreno Stark. My uncle was a wizard who played Beater on the Gryffindor Quidditch team," he said. It was the closest relation he could think of with the wizarding world.

"Gryffindor?" Fred grinned. "Excellent, you'll probably be in that house too, if your uncle was. Family members usually get in the same house." James nodded.

"I'll eat the Sorting Hat if I get into Hufflepuff, or worse, Slytherin," James declared solemnly. Fred snorted.

"Why don't you eat the Sorting hat anyways, just to see what happens."

"Then what will they use to sort people?"

"Dunno, maybe you'll have to sit on them, and you'll burp out the house?"

"Hufflepuff's not bad," Louis murmured. "I fancy being in that house."

"Actually," Loreno cut in. "You just said that Molly was in Slytherin, so family aren't always in the same house." Fred sighed as James rolled his eyes again.

"Well, not always, but there's always the odd one out," James said wisely. "The Weasley family is so big now, there's bound to be some people who don't get into Gryffindor. Louis' sisters are both in Ravenclaw." Loreno rubbed his temples and frowned.

"Your family tree is so confusing," he muttered. "How are you all related?" Fred cleared his throat.

"Well, James' mum is my dad's younger sister, so I'm his cousin and I also have an older sister. Louis' dad is my dad's oldest brother, and he had two older sisters. Lucy's dad is my dad's older brother and she had an older sister named Molly, the only Slytherin Weasley," Fred explained. "We're all cousins."

Loreno nodded. That was some family. He sunk back into his book, reading about the wand movement required for the Hovering Charm when his thoughts were interrupted again.

"Guess what Teddy gave me when we were at the Platform?" James grinned.

"A clean pair of knickers?" Fred answered with an expression of genuine concern on his face. The compartment exploded with immature laughter. James looked annoyed.

"No, 'course not, can it or I'll glue a pair of Lucy's knickers on your face," he grumbled. They laughed again, then, shaking his hair out of his eyes, James took out an old piece of parchment dramatically from his pocket. Loreno, Fred and Louis were confused.

"It's a map of Hogwarts," James explained patiently. "Teddy won't tell me how to use it, but he says that it shows everyone, everywhere, anytime, as long as you know the password. He says it's a quest to see if I'm worthy of the map or not." The boys looked at the parchment eagerly. "All we have to do is tap the paper with our wands and say the magic words."

Fred took out his wand and tapped the parchment, saying, "Password." Nothing happened. James tapped it and muttered, "We want to know your password." Once again nothing happened. Louis closed his eyes thoughtfully then, tapping the parchment, he said, "Apples." Loreno rolled his eyes and grabbed the parchment. "Open Sesame!" he said clearly. Still, the parchment remained blank.

"Map of Hogwarts."

"We love Hogwarts."

"Merlin."

"Abracadabra."

"One."

"Wizards rules."

"Treacle Tart?"

Again and again, the parchment remained blank. Fed up, James snatched the paper and poked it ferociously. "I, the super-mega-awesome-foxy-hot James Sirius Potter, command the map to reveal the password," he shouted. And, like magic, words written in a bright green ink appeared on the parchment.

_Mr. Prongs is pleasantly surprised to see someone with such an amazing name as James Potter, though he is astonished that someone would give their son an ungodly name like 'Sirius'._

_Mr. Padfoot would like to apologize for Mr. Prongs blatant jealously of anyone with the name Sirius, and it is clearly they get their good looks from that particular man, though they could never compete with Mr. Padfoot._

_Mr. Moony would like to point out how unwise it is for someone to name their child after two big headed gits, and would like to ask Mr. James Sirius Potter to stop poking at the parchment so harshly, or we'll never reveal our password._

_Mr. Wormtail hints that the password has to do with the goal of the map and bids Mr. James Sirius Potter a fun time figuring it out._

James stared at the parchment in awe while Loreno and Fred chortled loudly. Louis looked out the window pensively and said nothing.

"Well, at least something happened," Fred laughed. "What do think they meant by 'goal of the map'?" James and Loreno shrugged.

"All I know is that it's a map of Hogwarts with all the secret passages and teachers on it," James said. "Maybe we're supposed to use it to avoid being caught out of bounds!"

"Or late to lessons," Loreno added. "What? I don't want to get detention on the first day of school!" he said defensively, looking around at James and Fred's incredulous faces.

"Alright, let's see," Fred muttered. "I will use this map to avoid being caught by teachers." He tapped the map, but nothing happened. James tapped the map and tried again.

"I will use this map to play pranks on people." Nothing happened.

"Maybe you're being too specific," Loreno said. "Avoiding teachers and playing pranks all result in detention, so the password could be, 'I will use this to avoid detention because I am up to no good." As he spoke, he tapped the parchment hopefully. Once again, words appeared on the parchment.

_Do you solemnly swear on it?_

They stared at the parchment, trying to work out what this means. James tapped the parchment hesitantly. "I solemnly swear that I will use this to avoid detention because I am up to no good." They held in their breath, waiting for something to happen. The parchment stayed blank. Fred threw his hands up in frustration.

"Bloody hell! What are we doing wrong?" he complained, exasperated. Louis looked away from the window and stared at the map.

"I think your password's a bit wordy. There's definitely the 'I solemnly swear' part, but the next part should be shorter," he said thoughtfully. Taking the map from Fred, he tapped it with his wand.

"I solemnly swear that I will use this to avoid detention." Nothing happened.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." They gasped as the parchment began to fill up with words.

_Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs, Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief-Makers, are proud to present: THE MARAUDER'S MAP_

The boys whooped and high fived each other, ecstatic from success. The previously blank parchment now showed every inch of the castle and grounds of Hogwarts, and the best part was the little dots that were labelled with their name underneath in tiny writing. The headmistress, Minerva McGonagall, was chasing after Peeves the Poltergeist on the fifth floor, Rebeus Hagrid was in his hut on the grounds, and Filius Flitwick was in the Great Hall.

"Wicked," James whispered in awe. "This is probably the best thing in the entire world!" His eyes misted over as he thought of all the pranks he could pull without being caught. Fred's eyes darted back and forth as he tried to memorize every detail on the map. Loreno was mostly amazed at the amount of work the Marauders must have put in to create the map. Louis sat back with an uncharacteristic smug look on his face. They were interrupted by the sound of an old witch pushing a trolley full of sweets down the aisle.

"Anything from the trolley, dears?" she called as she stopped at the boys' compartment. Fred looked up eagerly, grabbing handfuls of sickles from his pocket. James stuffed the map hastily in his pocket and followed suite. Loreno hid behind his book, not wanting anyone to know he didn't have any money on him, and Louis continued to stare out the window.

James looked distinctly annoyed as he and Fred re-entered the compartment, pockets bulging with sweets. Fred was snickering as he opened a package of liquorice wands. Sparks shot out of the end of the candy when he bit into it. Loreno looked from one to the other, his curiosity aroused. But before he could ask, Louis already cut in.

"What did James do now?" he asked with a tinkling laugh. James scowled, and then turned to Loreno.

"Here, take some of my chocolate frogs, I reckon I bought too many." Loreno was pretty sure James was trying to change the subject, but accepted the frogs anyways. As he took out the frog from it's packaging, Fred couldn't help himself and spilled out the story.

"There was only one more box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans left, so James tries to buy it, but this other girl wanted it too, so she burst out crying when James snatched the box before she could reach it. The trolley lady was glaring at James and started scolding him for bullying a little defenceless girl and making her cry, so in the end, he had to give her the Beans. Then, when the trolley lady left, the girl stuck out her tongue and ran back into her compartment! He got owned by a girl!" Fred added with a gloating smile on his face. James pursed his lips and turned away, staring out the window resolutely.

They spent the rest of the train ride teasing James about the trolley lady and the girl, and it was only until Loreno and Fred both ate some Creature Confection that James had slipped into the candy and they started howling like a wolf and croaking like a frog that they stopped teasing him. Their compartment was filled with animal like screeches for the next hour, so that neighbouring students dropped in to complain about the noise, only to have fireworks set off in their face, leaving them spitting out sparks as they stumbled away.

The sky outside the train turned orange and red from the sunset and a voice echoed through the train.

"We will be arriving at Hogwarts in five minutes time, please dress in your robes and leave your trunks on the train. They will be brought to the castle separately."


End file.
